The Trick to Successful Relationships
About a decade ago my husband, Jimmy, said, “Sweetheart, I want to fulfill my dream of owning land in the country.”
What’s missing in that declaration?
My dreams.
This urban girl, aka moi, loves the city, especially “my” city – Dallas. It isn’t the most scenic or unique locale; but, I’ve got roots here. It’s in the center of the U.S. – it’s easy to travel anywhere. We’ve got good museums, good hospitals, and good food. And, yes, good shopping.
How did I end up on a ranch?
All relationships – whether professional or personal – survive or die on your ability to solve issues.
When it came to buying a ranch – we had an issue. He wanted it and I did not. In fact, I thought he was joking. We knew nothing about owning a ranch – he’s a dentist and I run a communication consulting company!
Problem solving suggestions
- Listen: First I had to really listen to what he wanted.
- Rearrange: Then I had to rearrange my perception of the situation. Did I want to live with an unhappy partner? NO. I then realized this was going to happen and I was either going to be part of the process, or NOT part of the process.
- Compromise: Finally we compromised. We found a place close enough to Dallas so that we could be weekend ranchers, still having our urban lives.
- Luck: And then there’s just plain luck. (Or maybe it’s a function of timing.) We found Star Ranch, a place we could afford from someone desperate to sell.
So, how did I end up with longhorns? I don’t even own a dog or cat.
The seller left them! We inherited 5 longhorns. We signed the papers, returned the next weekend to spend our first night at the ranch and NOW THERE WERE SIX COWS. We had our first baby! I didn’t even know the cow was female, let alone pregnant.
Here’s your trivia for the day: all longhorns have, well, long horns. Males and females.
The best thing I never wanted
Jimmy was so happy that I was happy that he said, “You name our longhorn baby.” “Ok,” I replied, “Her name is Bliss”. He responded, “You can’t name a cow Bliss. Maybe ‘Chuck’ or ‘Filet’ but not ‘Bliss'”. But we did. And, that’s exactly what this place has become: a place of bliss. A respite to clear your head and add more to your soul.
We solved our issue by listening, shifting, and compromising.
And that makes me lucky, grateful, and blissed out.
#communication #speakforyourself #karencortellreisman #StarRanch
