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Everything in life needs a good edit – your diet, your closet & your words

Everything in life needs a good edit – your diet, your closet & your words

Cross out your deletes!

If you’re like me you have thousands of digital pics on your phone or some other cloud storage. You spend precious time scrolling through them to find The One You Want To Show At Your Dinner With Friends.

Wirecutter expert, Max Eddy, has some advice on cleaning out your camera roll. The solution? Build in a “delete day” habit. Take a few minutes daily to search that day’s date in past years and then whack away. Delete, sort into albums, or save. With time you’ll see a transformation from photo warehouse to “curated gallery”!

Everything in life needs a good edit from time to time.

I’ll leave your diet, closet and photos in your hands. As for your words, build in this Wirecutter strategy. Here’s how to clean it up.

“Words ‘n Phrase Delete” habit

Salty Sailor Words. I am walking again! I had a knee surgery 10 weeks ago that left me non weight bearing for 6 weeks that meant using a walker and a wheel chair,  followed by just the walker and then a cane. Why am I telling you this? Because I found myself using curse words to describe my situation! Yes, I admit that my frustration over the whole deal brought out some graphic phrases. I am deleting these words NOW. They detract from my gravitas.

🎤  What words belie your personal brand?

Overused Cliches and Phrases.

  • “At the end of the day” – this one wins an award for excessive use.
  • “To be honest” – is everything else you say not honest?
  • “You know what I mean?” – ummm, yes I do, unless you confused me, in which case I’d ask you to clarify.

🎤  What phrases are you using that add nothing to your meaning? Be intentional.

Verbal Clutter. The main offenders include ➜

  • “Umm”, “You know”, “And, so… anyway”.
  • I also can’t stand the “Illy Family” – filler words we can all do without. “Really”, “Actually”, “Basically”, “Truly”, and “Literally”.

🎤  Monitor your use of word clutter. Wear your “Anti-Verbal-Clutter Hat” in non-stress situations and practice deleting these superfluous words.

😳 I’m embarrassed to share that I have 21,539 photos and 641 videos on my iPhone. We all need to edit something from time to time!

© 2024 Karen Cortell Reisman, All rights reserved 

Photo ©:  123RF Stock Photo

6 Ways to Appear More Authoritative at Work

6 Ways to Appear More Authoritative at Work

Emerging leaders beware: are you undermining your own authority without realizing it?

Here are 6 ways to exude confidence and appear to be a leader, according to U.S. News & World Report writer Alison Green.

🎤  Get in synch, up front, with your direct report.

Have alignment with your supervisor on issues facing your team and company. You will lose authority if your boss reverses what you are doing and saying.

🎤  Know how to answer questions when you don’t know the answer.

You will not know how to handle every situation that crosses your path. To respond with confidence in these scenarios learn to use time as your negotiating factor. Example: “You’ve raised some valid concerns and you’ve given me lots to think about. I’ll get back to you on Friday.” Note: follow up when you say you’ll follow up.

🎤  Reduce your verbal clutter.

Fillers like “um,” “you know,” and “I think,” dilute your point, make you look nervous and decreases your gravitas. Try to erase this clutter by being aware of what fillers you use and wearing your imaginary Verbal Clutter Hat. Hint: practice this de-cluttering technique in less stressful situations and the habit will carry over into your work life.

🎤  Be aware of your tone of voice.

Don’t end sentences with a question mark unless they’re questions! This bad habit, called “upspeak”, negates your authority. Also, use declarative sentences. These are simple statements providing information or stating facts. Your tone of voice implies authority vs sounding hesitant and unsure.

🎤  Use the Power of the Pause.

Sounds easy but it’s not! You rush to fill in the spaces. You might chatter nervously or do a quick laugh/giggle at the end of your sentences. Both belie your sense of authority. State your thoughts and then stop. When answering questions you can pause to formulate your thoughts before responding. Become comfortable with silence.

🎤  Be straightforward.

Say what you want to say, even in difficult or awkward conversations. You will appear more confident and authoritative by being direct. Addressing issues is part of your job.

PowerPoint Power Tips (hint – stop doing what you always do!)

PowerPoint Power Tips (hint – stop doing what you always do!)

Audiences rebel against PowerPoint

Have you ever gone to sleep at night saying to yourself, “Darn! I wish I had seen one more PowerPoint deck today.” ?

Have you ever gone to sleep saying to yourself, “Darn! I wish I had been more inspired today.”* ?

You, all of you, from CEO to Sales to Personnel to Purchasing, you are killing us with your PowerPoint.

That’s because bullets kill.

Five Main PowerPoint Offenders

  • Too many graphics on one slide.
  • Too many topics.
  • Too many bullets & too many sentences (which are worse than bullets).
  • Too many details.
  • Too many dissolves, spins or other cheesy transitions.

Every Main Offender on this list starts with “too many” because you are over-stuffing each slide. We do not know where to look first. In the midst of our confusion, we stop listening to you in hopes of being entertained by something on your slide.

Boredom + lethargy sets in and we shift over to what we really want to do – a sneaky wild round of Candy Crush Saga.

So, what’s a great slide look like?

It’s VISUAL.

Effective slides incorporate these three commandments

  1. Thou Must use good, clear (not copyrighted by someone else) pictures that support your message.
  2. Thou Must think ‘Less is More’ when putting your slides together. At the very least, can you please take one busy slide with many points and divide it into several slides so that each one has only one point/slide?
  3. Thou Must remember YOU are the presenter, NOT your slide deck. Don’t hide behind your PowerPoint deck – literally (you’re standing in the dark or hidden by your computer) and figuratively (you’re reading your slides and adding nothing else).

On the other hand, keep doing what you always do and Speak For Yourself® & Associates will remain busy cleaning it up for you!

*FYI, inspiration comes from stories that reinforce your message that can be supported by great visuals.

© 2024 Karen Cortell Reisman, All rights reserved 

Photo ©:  123RF Stock Photo

 

Surprising Adds that Could Make You a Super Communicator

Surprising Adds that Could Make You a Super Communicator

Ever been to a business event, power breakfast or strategy session dominated by one person? How about a dinner party or book club? You know the one!

The best communicators aren’t always the ones who talk the most in these various settings.

Charles Duhigg, Pulitzer Prize–winning investigative journalist, shares three ways we can be “super communicators” and really connect with almost everyone.

How to be a super communicator on a consistent basis

Ask questions

  • Super communicators ask a lot more questions. In fact, 10 to 20 times more questions.
  • Some questions invite you in. “Tell me more about your xxx.”
  • Some are deep questions – getting others to talk about beliefs, experiences. “How do you feel about being on the board of xxx?” Or, “Can you tell me a memory that is really important to you?”
  • Super communicators ask not just about facts but how you feel about what you are doing – all in hopes of creating reciprocal authenticity.

Be a humble conversationalist

Most super communicators were once crummy communicators. Duhigg’s research points out that these struggling communicators had to become keenly aware of having to listen intently to understand what the other person was saying. This heightened awareness propelled them to become super communicators with these attributes:  being honest, authentic,  vulnerable and nonjudgmental.

Looping for Understanding (great for conflict management):

  1. Ask a question … a deeper one. (see my first point above)
  2. Repeat back what they said.
  3. Ask if you got it right.

You don’t have to agree or disagree. “I understand where you are coming from. I think I’ve heard what you are trying to say. I have a different point of view…”

7 Super Communicator Goals

  • To listen for understanding.
  • To lower the burden of the conversation. You are not trying to get them to agree with you.
  • To find a connection.
  • To get others in the group to speak.
  • To be generally interested in what others are thinking.
  • To give credit to others when context permits.
  • To better navigate tough conversations.

Don’t dominate a conversation. Be the super communicator that makes the conversation of interest to all.

Thank you to Judy Dedmon Coyle for sharing this podcast with me.

Source: Krys Boyd’s NPR “Think” Podcast with Charles Duhigg, author of “Supercommunicators: How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection

© 2024 Karen Cortell Reisman, All rights reserved 

Nothing Eclipses Your Executive Presence

Nothing Eclipses Your Executive Presence

Well, maybe on April 8, 2024. 😎

That’s the date of the once-in-a-lifetime total solar eclipse that will darken our skies, especially in my hometown, Dallas, Texas  … we are right in the middle of the path.

But, on every other day ➜

Show your executive presence by using the 7 C’s

Jun Medalla, writing for Business Insider, outlines these seven core tenets of executive presence:

☀️ Composure – Have grace under pressure. Stay calm.

☀️ Connection – Don’t hog the stage. Show others you’re engaged by asking for feedback and having good eye contact to all in the room and leaning towards those that speak.

☀️ Charisma – Share your positive energy by shining the spotlight on others. Listen, ask questions, have good eye contact and an open facial expression (aka smile). Make others feel understood.

☀️ Confidence – My mother-in-law, a professional portrait photographer always said, “Sit dynamically forward!”. Use body language to take control of the room. Sit tall. Stand tall.

☀️ Credibility – Demonstrate integrity, show expertise and good judgment, and be accountable, responsible and dependable.

☀️ Clarity – Prepare for meetings to avoid uncertainty. Use our Speak For Yourself® Blueprint presentation outline to strategize your 2 to 5 main points.

☀️ Conciseness – Less is more. Embrace your inner editor by asking yourself these 3 questions before you speak: “So what?” and  “Who cares?”  and  “Is anyone interested in this besides me?”.

Don’t get eclipsed by poor executive presence. You do not want to be kept in the dark, except from 1:40 to 1:44 CST, in Dallas on 4.8.24.  ☀️⚫️☀️

© 2024 Karen Cortell Reisman, All rights reserved 

How to Really Know a Person – Part 2

How to Really Know a Person – Part 2

Last week’s blog shared three ways we sabotage personal and professional relationships by being Diminishers, according to David Brooks, the author of How To Know a Person – The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen.

Today I’ll share some constructive steps that make it easier to see other people in all their fullness. Brooks call this an Illuminator’s outlook.

Illuminators: How to really see another person

➜ Receptivity – overcoming insecurities and self-preoccupation & opening yourself up to the experience of another.

Brooks says, “It means you resist the urge to project your own viewpoint; you do not ask, ‘How would I feel if I were in your shoes?’ Instead, you are patiently ready for what the other person is offering.” This art of patience and empathy is a practice to strive for.

➜ Active curiosity – having an explorer’s heart.

Keep asking questions with a genuine interest of wanting to know more about others. Studies show that life is better when you’re curious.

➜ Tenderness – deep emotional concern about another being.

Think Mister Rogers as he interacted with children. Think Ted Lasso as he relates to his players. Believe!

➜ A holistic attitude – trying to see the “all” of a person.

How often do we mis-see people by seeing only a piece of them? Brooks comments, “Some doctors mis-see their patients when they see only their bodies. Some employees mis-see workers when they see only their productivity.” Our goal is to resist every urge to simplify in this way of perceiving others.

Being an Illuminator is an ideal. We can all try our best to illuminate others without imposing cliché character types. Think about how this outlook can elevate your work and personal relationships.

© 2024 Karen Cortell Reisman, All rights reserved 

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